Every day we make choices and decisions. Some we think about, ponder, weigh the pros and cons and take our time choosing. Then there are those choices we don’t think about, they are easy and require little to no thought. Going for coffee with a friend you haven’t seen in a long time, smiling at the cute guy at the gym, buying a pair of jeans because they make your butt look amazing. Then there are the choices that you used to give no thought to that you now have to give every ounce of energy you have into making. For me these once easy decisions are around food and eating. I used to give it no thought and now it takes all the energy I have sometimes to make the right choice, the healthy choice, the choice that is going to move me towards my goal of a healthier more vital me.
I had this thought that once I made the decision to start working with Emilia and live a healthier life style it would be easy. There would be a big fat red “easy” button sittin’ there. Nope. I started to have to get honest with emotions and feelings that have been buried deep. Feels of the hate for those individuals that made elementary school and high school more difficult and the same feelings of hate towards myself for letting them. The more I started looking the more I began to process these emotions. Over 20 years of habits, choices and decisions laid out in front of you is never an easy pill to swallow. I am then reminded of a scene in movie Sex In The City 2 where Samantha is about to take a handful of pills and Charlotte asks her how she’s going to swallow all those. Samantha smiles and says “Have we met?” I have started to swallow this pill and wage a war on the unhealthy habits and choices that I previously gave no thought to because who I was in high school is not the same girl that I am today.
Choices are made in every moment of every day. Making one wrong choice in one moment is human, it’s how long you let that choice derail you where strength is found. I had a challenging week in a lot of areas, but in the area of eating I made better choices this week than I did last week. I wasn’t perfect and that’s ok, because I wasn’t as bad as the week before. I am choosing to celebrate this because this journey isn’t about being perfect, and for a recovering perfectionist, well heck….
Yesterday was weigh in and measurements with Emilia….4.5lbs lost never to be found again!