Day 9 took some work…..Even sitting down to write this this morning I am full of distractions and finding myself not really wanting to write, but I refuse to break my word with myself so here I am. Yesterday took more work than any day so far in this challenge and it is only Day 9…
All day my brain was wandering to different foods that it was craving. After Monday’s huge success of busting 20K steps on my Fitbit I had absolutely no desire to exercise or walk. It was interesting…I told myself that I wasn’t allowed to go home until I cracked 10,000 on my Fitbit. So, I went to walk around Metrotown because it is air conditioned…well…not the smartest idea. I was walking past all the frozen yogurt, ice cream, chocolate and candy stores and I started to get annoyed. I told myself that I was getting annoyed with all the people but really it was my body looking for a fix, so I left. I stopped in at the Safeway to purchase my monthly bus pass and again…annoyed. I wanted to go to the bakery and buy one of the big ass cookies or to the deli for a sausage role. I could hear the justification process going on in my brain. “Come on Nikki, you did awesome yesterday, you earned it!” or “Go ahead Nikki one bad day won’t matter.” So I quickly bought my bus pass and left. I don’t care that I needed a couple vegetables for juicing, I wasn’t to be trusted in that moment to buy only those vegetables. Once I reached my front door I was only at 9200 steps so…I dropped my bags inside my front door and set off around the block. I literally wasn’t kidding when I said I wasn’t allowed inside because I knew I would sit down and it would be game over.
When I walked inside I was so grateful that my incredibly amazing cousin delivered to me this Kale Salad that her amazeballs chef husband made. As I began to eat the salad, it tasted sooooo so so good, I realized I was enjoying it far more than any burger I would have had. That isn’t to say I won’t ever eat a burger again, but right now while dealing with the mental side of weight loss and my habits, a burger isn’t a good idea. Malcolm…if you are reading this…you need to bottle that dressing, I am not kidding!
Sitting here this morning, writing this, here is what I realized….yesterday was a test of my mental capacities on this journey. I sucked in the moment, but I am sitting on the other side of yesterday ecstatic with the outcome. Tomorrow is done and over, now all I have to do is focus on today…..which also happens to be Canada’s 148th Birthday! Curious what my day 9 homework was yesterday….
Because it’s awesome!
Molly acknowledges that this one is vague and I find it difficult to connect with. She shares the store of her friend Nina who “trains to be awesome.” Nina speaks of always chasing the elusive “perfect” body and realizing that that is a road filled with disappointment and defeat so just embrace your body as it is and train to be more awesome than you already are….hmmm ok typing this I am getting it…..
Mantra: My body is awesome, and every day, with everything I do, I will treat it as such.
Action Step: Define what “training to be awesome” means for you, and set a really specific goal that allows you to train to be awesome, and make sure that your current program aligns with that.
Shedding all of this excess weight and eating all this healthy food is not going to make me awesome or more awesome. I am already awesome, but I am limited to the number of awesome activities that I can do with ease. I have a long list of things that I would like to complete. They are run another 5k race, run an 8k, run a 10K, run a half marathon, learn to snowboard and go skydiving to name a few….to do some of those I need to train to me awesome to make those activities easier and possible. So yesterday’s struggles are in service of me checking these activities off of my “to do” list.
So….let’s go face Day 10!