I get to start today’s post with some terribly exciting news! I stepped on the scale, as I have every Sunday morning during this challenge, and I lost 5lbs! That bring my total to 7.2lbs in the first 14 days of this 30 day challenge! I was really quite excited yesterday!
Yesterday was my first hiccup in the challenge. I was having a great day. I lost more calories as my weight went down, not a problem, I had my “cheat meal” which was Subway…again I got harassed that that wasn’t really a “cheat meal” but it was what I was craving, so that is what I had. However, I stopped at the grocery store and purchased some quinoa sticks, they are D.E.L.I.C.I.O.U.S and I highly recommend them! I say down to watch a movie and I am not sure what triggered it, but I had zoned out and fallen into what I call “mindless eating.” I immediately put them away and felt an immediate sense of shame. I texted a friend and my mom, both of which served to remind me that a.) I caught myself and stopped b.) I didn’t say “f*ck it -I’m already here” and keep going c.) It is not the WORST snack to be caught in while mindless eating. I did my best to track it in my calories, but fear I may have undershot it a little, so that is why you see the overage on my intake.
Fitness yesterday proved a bit of a challenge. It was a ridiculously hot one in Vancouver yesterday and adding to that is an air advisory warning because of some serious forest fires burning close to Vancouver. There are a lot of things I could have done differently, but I was also facing some residual bathroom visits because of the previous days juice cleanse so I took it easy, plane and simple. The air advisory is still at a high level in Vancouver and they are asking everyone to not exercise outside, so my cousin Charmagne and I will not be doing our weekly walk this week. I will head to the gym to get my steps in!
Yesterday was one day. Here is what I can celebrate. I have gone 14 days without chips, candy, ice cream, doughnuts, cake, cookies, pizza or any of the other yummy foods that I used to binge on. I am 14 days into my 30 day challenge and this is the furthest I have ever made it in a personal challenge without cheating and giving up. I have lost 7.2lbs in 14 days! These are all things worth celebrating. I have been saying, this challenge isn’t about being perfect. It is about the mental side of weight loss, learning to love my body and interrupting the behaviors that lead me to binge and over eat.
Because I’m not just, “strong for a girl.” I am just plain STRONG.
Owning our strength is something that Molly has touched on a couple times in this challenge and I notice it is something I need constant reminding of. Strength doesn’t just mean physical, it also means mental and emotional. Molly quotes a favorite saying of mine by Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Mantra: “I am strong, smart, powerful, and beautiful, and my actions have a direct and positive effect on these truths.”
Today we focus on the fact that we are not just, “strong for a girl.”
We don’t just, “look good for having 2 kids.”
And we’re not just, “pretty for our age.”
We just simply are those things.
No qualifiers necessary.
Action step: Take 5 minutes to write down beliefs you have, or compliments you’ve been given that are similar to those above Then re-write them without the qualifier, and add what you have done to deserve the compliment so that you can truly believe it. Then read them to yourself 3 times.
Yesterday I was standing in the door way having a conversation with my lovely landlord and one of her daughters arrived., it has been a few weeks since I had seen her last. Her first words were “Holy crap Nikki you are looking good!” I immediately began to qualify her compliment and started to discount my efforts until my landlord stopped me and said “No, you don’t get to do that. You have moxie in spades girl, not own it, don’t discount it!” I was thinking to myself “I only look good because I have been working hard on getting healthy” instead of just owning the compliment and trying to down play it.
One day at a time!